Growing up, I knew how important it was to keep a CLEAN house. In the words of Ferris Bueller, “Their house is like a museum: everything is very old and you’re not allowed to touch ANYTHING.” My mother trained my sister and I early on that our home was always to be immaculate, and looking back I remember it was forever in perfect “model home” condition. Nothing was allowed “out of place” and THINGS had a high value placed upon them.
My sister and I spent some time together a few weeks ago and she expressed regret over “following in mom’s footsteps.” When she grew up and became a keeper of her home, she was exactly like my mom. She shared with me that she wished now that she had not placed so much emphasis on a “perfect home” and enjoyed her home more by opening it up to others and allowing her children more freedom in “messing it up” during play.
I struggle with the opposite end of the spectrum: messiness. We don’t always pick up immediately and with five kids, toys and “things” can accumulate quickly so that “picking up” can become more of a chore than if we had just cleaned our items right after we were finished with them BEFORE getting anything else out. There have been times when I would NOT have let a visitor in our home until we had done a tidy first!
As home keepers, we need to have BALANCE. God is not a God of chaos, but order, and everyone functions better in a tidy, uncluttered home. If our home is too messy, it is no longer efficient. Spending time looking for something can be time WASTED. Although I want to be a good steward of all God has given me, taking care of my home and possessions, I also don’t want my children to ever think that the material possessions are more important than people. I need to give my children the GRACE to be CHILDREN, playing, making discoveries, and using their imaginations.
I remember a speaker once giving an wonderful example of this concept. She shared that her child was running in from outside so excited about something he had found outdoors. She stopped him immediately, though, scolding him for dirty shoes (and footprints on her freshly scrubbed kitchen floor), busily cleaning the mess. By the time they had finished cleaning, and the mom tried to get the child to share what he had discovered, he quietly muttered, “never mind” and the moment had been lost forever.
That example has stuck with me forever because I am sure I have squelched many discoveries as well!
As wives, mothers, and keepers of our homes, we want to build a strong foundation on Christ, on His Love and Grace. As we build, we want to lay bricks of kindness, forgiveness, patience, gentleness, compassion, joy, knowledge, and faithfulness.
May we never tear down our own home with words of bitterness, complaining, or anger. May we never tear down our homes because of a critical spirit. May our children never think that possessions are more important than people.
May we always go to the Word for our direction so that our homes are brilliant, not because they are in “model condition,” but because they reflect the Light of Christ.
By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures. Proverbs 24:3-4
Father God, help me to seek You above all else when “building” my home. May I be a reflection of You. Help me to have balance in my home, teaching my children to be good stewards, respecting what we have been given, but also that knowing that PEOPLE are more valued than any possession. Grant me patience, O Lord, and give me a “Kingdom Perspective.” Help me to remember “in light of eternity” what is important. Open my eyes to the areas of home-keeping where I need Your help and guidance! Make me a good example to my children who are watching. Thank You, Lord, for all You are and all You have given to me! I love You, Lord! In Jesus’ Name we pray. Amen.
Thanks so much for this Tracy. I had the other experience…my mom never taught us to clean, just cleaned up after us…so we never really learned how much of a chore it is and we also never really learned to keep things clean if we wanted too. Today I struggle with balancing clutter, cleanness and hospitality. No one wants to let others know we have an unkempt house so in those times we meet people at the door and walk outside to visit instead of inviting them in, we make excuses about how beautiful the day is, we should visit outside, or worse, instead of inviting people over for a meal, we take them out to eat…where you just never have the option of really deep and meaningful conversations. On the rare occasions when we have a messy house, we might hurriedly stuff clutter in closets or a spare bedroom, so we can make an appearance of clean to impress our friends.
Likewise, no one wants to let others know the sins in our lives. So, when we find ourselves flailing in a pile of muck, we meet our friends at the only place we can “look clean”… at church. We pretty up on the outside, so we can seem clean, but deep down we know we’ve shoved all our sin in the closet, instead of turning from it and running the other direction.
God on the other hand, knows us, and loves us just the same, and while he understands a house in disarray and our sin, he doesn’t like it, and his will is that we would look to him to get the strength and know how to clean it up.
So, where does my house need cleaning…just about everywhere ( except my junk room which I cleaned on Saturday)… but in reality, God is more interested in me getting my spirit cleaned up … off I go…to the Word, to let it convict me of where I need some deep cleaning…not just the surface kind…the Spring cleaning kind.
Thanks for this Tracy… I needed it today!
Oh, Paula, such wisdom! Thank you so much for taking the time to share. And, I echo your words exactly, “God in more interested in getting my spirit clean”! Often I will ask God to purify my heart…clean it up!
Blessings, Paula!
I so needed to “hear” this. I need to find that balance rather than having chaos alternated with periods of cleaning rampages. My children need constancy and gentleness…neat and orderly but not “rampages”. Thanks!
Oh, how true! I love “rampage”….what a great word to illustrate how I can behave. Children DO need gentleness and constancy. Thanks for sharing your insight!
Thank you! This is something I think about a lot.
Heather, you are welcome!
I think it is something that ALL women think about. God has placed this desire to nurture our family and care for our home….but we must find the BALANCE in our lives as we live it out.
Blessings, Heather!
I tend to lean to the side of un-tidy, and more “lived in” than perfect and “everything in its place”. Although I long the be the latter. Thank you for the reminder. I want to teach my daughter to enjoy her home but be a good keeper of her home, as well. Great post!
Thanks so much for your kind comments, Lisa. I think the BALANCE is so important and what we want to teach our children. And, what you said is KEY…”enjoying our homes.”
Blessings, Lisa!
Thank you so much for sharing! Agreeing with you in prayer, amen!
Hugs, HL
Thanks, Heather!
Blessings, friend!