Most of us ladies are born “fixers.” If something goes wrong, we have just got to fix it! And no doubt, if there is something wrong with someone, we’ve got to fix them also!
It’s an instinct that is deep within each of us, and most times irresistible, especially with those who live right under our own roof. Possibly, the urge to “fix” our husbands is a matter of urgency.
The responsibility to change others is a great responsibility and certainly a responsibility that will bring nothing but frustration and conflict!
What a lie that the enemy feeds us as women, that we can “fix” our spouses. Falling for such a lie will cause the focus to shift from what we can do to alter our own walk with the Lord to trying to change someone or something that we have no control over. The fact is that the only change that can take place is within our own hearts, with the leading and changing power of the Holy Spirit.
Whenever a wife is preoccupied with trying to correct her husband’s faults and flaws, what she is doing is taking the responsibility away from God. God never intended for this to be her job, and most likely the only thing that will result from this behavior is frustration and resentment towards her husband and possibly towards God.
Have you ever considered how many husbands would be changed if their wives were just willing to let God take over the changing process?
Christian wives have two powerful weapons that are available to them. These weapons will go a lot further than nagging, whining or even preaching!
THE FIRST WEAPON IS LIVING A GODLY LIFE!
Often times, the consistency and the faithfulness of a godly wife will bring conviction and spiritual hunger to our husbands.
THE SECOND WEAPON IS PRAYER!
When a wife consistently points out the things that she wishes her husband would change, she is most likely going to make her husband defensive and resistant. But when she takes her concerns to the Lord, she is appealing to a higher power to act in her husband’s life. How much harder is it for a man to resist God than to resist a nagging wife?
LUKE 2:19 “But Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart.”
I love the example of Mary! When an angel appeared to her and told her that she would be the mother of the Messiah – telling Joseph must have brought some anxiety. And when she told Joseph what had happened, he apparently did not believe her explanation. After all, he had not seen an angel! Reason led him to believe some other possibility for Mary to be with child.
Mary didn’t whine.
She didn’t cry.
She didn’t even try to persuade Joseph to think differently.
Instead, she waited on God and gave Him the opportunity to communicate directly to Joseph – which is exactly what happened.
The same God is waiting to communicate on your behalf. But we have to let Him.
Are you a “fixer?”
Do you tend to try to fix everything and everyone?
Let the One who is the ultimate fixer take control – His ways are far greater than ours.
Live a godly life and pray for your husband …
this is the way to his heart!
Please visit my blog daily over at http://womentakingastand.blogspot.com/
Great post – I heard a comment the other day – "She may not want him to fix it – but for him to listen" talking about a husband and wife….
The power of prayer is amazing.
Love,
Kelly
http://www.amazingsalvation.com
I went through a wee phase of this several months ago nagging my husband and not being very encouraging to him. I remember reading this scripture – a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day – Proverbs 27; 15
I can be a bit like this but I am praying and reading my bible and learning how to be more of an encouragement to my hubby and build him up.
God has made changes in his life which would not have occurred had I kept nagging at him.
Collette xxx
I have never looked at Mary in this area and in this way before! Thank you for pointing this out! That is a very powerful example – because if I were her I would have been highly annoyed/offended that he did not trust me or believe me! Thank you for this this morning! I needed to hear this!
Courtney
http://www.womenlivingwell-courtney.blogspot.com
I was in this very place -last night. I could feel the Holy Spirit doing "heart checks" on me the whole time. Finally, I got to the point of writing down what I WANTED to say (nag, fix, etc)in my journal, instead of actually verbalizing it. I would love to say that whatever "the arguement" actually was got worked out perfectly…but it didn't…and yet it did. God is so good (and gracious) to have blessed me with a man who I can't stay mad at(fusterated with or upset at) long and who loves me quite unconditionally.
I agree with Courtney. I never looked at Mary this way before. THIS verse (Luke 2:19) is the inspiration for my blog; "Treasured up and Pondered"… and now I have a deeper meaning to consider. The way I relate in my heart towards my husband. Thank you, for this post today.
Great post! This is something I often have to keep in mind, because there are times I REALLY want to fix my husband!
This was an amazing blessing to find this today…I needed this so much. Thanks so much for sharing this.
A constant lesson in need of refreshers. Silence can be golden, especially if coupled with closet prayer. Nice to have found you today.
Blessing!
Robin
i am a day late reading this post, but how i needed to read it at just this moment. thank u for this gentle reminder to let GOD do His work, while I let my husband be who he is and love him-accept him-in everything.