Be a Light
When was the last time you felt like a special cup of coffee? Or how about a special meal? Or maybe that new pair of shoes? Or a gym membership? Whatever it was, did the thought cross your mind to do it for your spouse first and then yourself?
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these. Mark 12:30 & 31
As mankind we don't have a problem loving ourselves, we have a problem loving others as much as we love ourselves. Our sin nature causes us to love ourselves, it is the born again part of us that causes us to love others. That involves self sacrifice.
Marriage needs to be the most self denying thing to prosper. We must consciously put our spouse ahead of ourselves. We must constantly seek what is best for the relationship not ourselves. We must surrender to Jesus. We cannot do it by ourselves, but under HIS covering we can. And when we do, it is the greatest light to the world.
A successful marriage is a light the world is looking for. It is a picture of THE bride and bridegroom. You want to see the world saved? Love your husband.
Blessings, Penny
Penny is a happily married preacher's wife in TN. They have 8 children, a wonderful son in law, and a grandbaby. Penny writes for several publications and blogs, but she is most blessed just to be used by Jesus.You can find Penny daily over at her personal blog PennyRaine.com.
This is such a beautiful post!! I just wrote one on dating your husband, because I feel it is vital to keep your marriage top priority in Christ. It is such a beautiful thing to behold a couple keeping God's word first and dying to self.
Oh my what a great post! I needed the reminder today as well. Why is always so easy to see other's imperfections and so difficult to see our own?
Wow - a short POWERFUL post! I love it - thank you!!! And you are so right - we are told to love ourselves more - to build up our self-esteem -but we already do love ourselves. That's our problem!
Courtney
http://www.womenlivingwell-courtney.blogspot.com
Penny! I couldn't agree more! Great post.
Nice to meet you! I'm now following your adorable blog!
Hugs,
Traci
http://www.ordinaryinspirations.blogspot.com
My man and I had a good talk about this very thing yesterday. We then went out and got breve's to share (speaking of a special coffee)! He loves me so well and I love him so well and we are so blessed when we trust one another enough to not worry about ourselves!
Happy Hermit, we have to use Jesus as our example, there is no way to the Father except through Him, we can only obtain salvation by surrendering to Him, and then we use Him as an example, putting others first doesn't even feel like denial when we do it with His help. And it is not destructive.
the Words of Jesus have all the answers
blessings, Penny
What wonderful words- wonderful encouragement. This reminds me to refrain from selfishness in my marriage. Sometimes I don't even realize that I am being selfish. Thank you.
Pray for Sarah
Happy Hermit,
It sounds like you're going through a very difficult time, and I can tell you I'VE BEEN THERE (I still feel like I AM THERE sometimes!). My husband is also not a Christian, and there have definitely been times when it's felt extremely UNFAIR to put his needs above my own when he would NEVER reciprocate.
Would you be willing to elaborate more on what sort of "spiritual devastation" you are experiencing by submitting to your husband? And what "base NEEDS" of yours are being neglected?
The Bible does talk about reciprocal love, but that's not what true, unconditional LOVE is about. Remember Romans 5:8 - "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." We can never reciprocate for what Jesus did for us, nor would He expect us to. His love is a gift, and he wants us to give our love in the same way.
The verse that I have constantly come back to is 1 Peter 3:1-2 "Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives." Even though my husband has not yet been "won over" to Christ, I have definitely seen changes in him as I've consciously made the decision to submit and obey, and he's definitely softened in his treatment of me.
I also think of Ephesians 6:7-8 "Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men, because you know that the Lord will reward everyone for whatever good he does, whether he is slave or free." Remember that since your husband is not a Christian, God does not hold him to the same standards as He holds you. And no, this is not fair at all, but remember that you WILL receive God's reward for your obedience - whether that reward is here on earth or up in heaven is up to Him.
One of the fruits of the spirit listed in Galatians 5:22-23 is longsuffering. The dictionary defines longsuffering as "patiently enduring wrongs or difficulties." This is certainly not something any of us would ask for in our lives, but God says it's a GOOD thing. I think the reason God brings hardships into our lives is to bring us closer to Him.
I'd really like to recommend the book "Stepping Heavenward" by Elizabeth Prentiss. It's about a woman's journey with God, facing all kinds of hardships, and growing closer to Him through it all. It may not pertain specifically to your situation, but it certainly deals with learning to submit and humble ourselves.
Kate
I suppose he is looking for afirmation that you love him. He seems to worry you will leave. It doesn't sound as if you would do that.
Would you be able to buy things on ebay?
I am not an expert on this by any means, I hope what I said doesn't offend and hope someone else says something.