How Do I View My Children As Blessings In The "Everyday?"
"Children are a blessing!"
Do you see that glorious principle in the above verse? Our children can give us comfort (rest) and delight! Hello! Love this! I cling to this verse.
But wait.
We can't just get the comfort and delight without putting in some work.
We absolutely must be willing to train and discipline our children...consistently, if we are to reap the reward of comfort and delight.
{Child disobeying}
Mommy: "Honey, are you choosing to disobey mommy?" (I like this phrasing because it shows the child that they have a choice, you are not just some mean dictator)
Child: {nods head up and down}
Mommy: "Will you obey?"
Child: "Yes"
Mommy: {Happy dance} "Wonderful! Jesus is so pleased when you obey because He gave you mommy and daddy to care for you and teach you what is good!"
What if they choose to disobey?
Child: {Continues to disobey after you asked them/told them not to do something}
Mommy: "I am so sorry that you chose to disobey, but I am going to have to give you a consequence so that you can learn how to obey mommy. God wants you to obey mommy and daddy because we know what is best for you and we love you."
{Follow through with "consequence" immediately. When finished with your choice of disciplinary action, hug them and say...}
"I love you and I forgive you."
{Go play, don't bring it up or talk about it again}
The truth is, training your child is much easier (and I would also add more effective) if you are a mother who stays home with her children because you can catch all the teachable moments that happen in day (there are tons!). If you are a working mommy, I encourage you with all my heart (if you can make it happen) to return home, for your children's sake.
They are your mark on the world.
They are your legacy, your testimony, and your contribution to mankind.
Don't let some other woman steal your influence.
Remember, 'The hand that rock the cradle is the hand that rules the world.'
That saying didn't just show up one day.
That proverb is the result of centuries of observation.
A mother's influence is unmatched."
-Voddie Bauchaum, Family Driven Faith
Oh, and the next time your kiddos practically lead you to violence because you are at your wits end, grab them and hug them as tight as you can (without suffocating them) and say, "I love you soooooooooooo...... much!" Keep hugging until fit of rage passes. :)
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You can find Sarah Mae at Like A Warm Cup Of Coffee and on on Twitter @sarahmaeblogs!
Wow, I just wrote a blog about this yesterday and it is due to post today. Of course I didn't say it as greacefully as you did but mine has a darling photo that my baby boy made for me :) Thanks for the reminder and the bible verses. I am thinking of printing them up and posting them in my home as the bible tells us to do.
Sarah this is a fantastic post. I think we all find it hard to view our children as blessings in the day to day and the verses you have given us are really very helpful. I also admire your courage in urging mums to stay at home. I do this and it is mega challenging, probably more so that work but I wouldn't change it for the world!
Collette x
I wholeheartedly agree with all your thoughts. I would add one more thing at the end of the discipline process -- pray every time, no matter how big or small the offense, asking the Lord's forgiveness, too. The habit it develops (and reminds us momma to do as well) is critical!
And the other thought would be to not grow weary in the training up process. While obedience in action is a the training field for the little ones, it is the attitude of the heart that is the training field for the older ones. Both need to be lovingly addressed by moms and dads engaging with their kids. It is just too easy to assume they'll outgrow it. Bah! None of us outgrow sin, but we do learn to put it off.
Thanks, again! Off to hug my kids and love them with consistency today, but by the grace of God.
Thank you so much for sharing this post. I have had times of anger and have been trying to learn the "soft answer turneth away anger" by speaking in a whisper. One of the things that also is hard is consistency with both myself and my husband.
Have a blessed day!
eLisa -
"pray every time, no matter how big or small the offense, asking the Lord's forgiveness, too."
"None of us outgrow sin, but we do learn to put it off."
YES!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you for adding these!
FYI - over at my blog today I am "tag-teaming" with this post! Check it out! :)
I so needed these posts, Sarah Mae!
Thank you for this post! I needed this advice on training and correcting. My son has a hard time listening to what I say :)
Enjoyed this post so much. Well written.
The rivalry between brothers and sisters is too much sometime in our house. The squabbles are enough to make me go bald. I use this time to go over treating each other kinder, talking it out instead of fighting it out. I, as their mother, have the job of training my children and must keep it up or they may grow up to be disrespectful, boligerant adults. Thanks for the inspiration!
Great post! I have found this method to work well in our family,too. Thanks for sharing.
Oh Sarah Mae, this was SO beautifully said! I also LOVE what eLisa said. That is soo critical. I need to remember to implement that, too.
Great post!! I have been blessed to be at home with my son through the years to train and discipline. And we also pray every time as part of the discipline process, not only to ask the Lord's forgiveness but to ask for help to change our son's heart in whatever area he is having trouble.
This post was needed this very day! Thank you for reminding me and for the awesome posts I receive every day! THey are such a blessing.
Awesome Sarah Mae! What a wonderful reminder and such an encouragement. You are so right to encourage mothers to come home. There is NO better place for a mother to be than where she has been called to be by our Father - H.O.M.E.
Beautiful!!
Excellent reminders, Sarah Mae! As usual, from your fingers to my heart via the Holy Spirit. Thank you for being a usable vessel for the Kingdom!
TeriLynneU -
"from your fingers to my heart"
Thank you! That is so beautiful!
Hey Sarah Mae!
You offer such sober advice. It is good that you are able to contribute here "At the Well."
I must also compliment your way of rebuking, it's no-nonsense, but gentle.
You seem to be one who is not afraid of telling the truth, and this is good!
I enjoy learning from you!
smooches,
Larie
I love your post, thank you for sharing it...
zcouple.com
Very encouraging post, Sarah Mae! Just a few added thoughts from an "older" mom. Yikes, I am really not that old, but anyway.
"Correct your son" when they are young and they will be a delight and comfort to you is so true. While your little ones are little you may not see any fruit from your discipline and you will question yourself on how many times you have to correct them on the same issue, but DO NOT GROW WEARY for you will reap if you do not give up for their sinful ways will not go away on their own.
Yes, it can be exhausting, frustrating, tear-jerking work, but it will be the most rewarding work you will ever do!
Consistency- do not let that one throw you for a loop, yes, we need to be consistent. When you fail in this area, ask the Lord for help and remember that His mercies are new every morning-every minute!
And if you are a working mother, I too would encourage you to do everything you possibly can to come home. I worked until my daughters were 5 and 3. Those are our most regretted years, but my husband wanted me to work. I was able to come home after I gave it completely to the Lord and He worked a MIRACLE in my husband, almost immediately. I can't say that the Lord will work in the same way, but I do know that He can work miracles!
Now go love on those little sinners!
I needed this and God opened this up for me today. I feel like so many other mothers do not yell and nag their children and it makes me sick when I do it which is way too often. I want it stopped and I know God knows my hearts desire and he has taken this article and thank you Sarah Mae for your wisdom and help to those of us that do not know what they are doing as mothers. I always thought I would be a great mother and having children showed a side of me to myself that surprised me. God is changing me but I want to be changed instantly. Thank you again and I will continue reading At the Well. Jessica